Brian's Blog in Battle Creek

We have time!

2009-12-18T14:15:00.001-05:00

I love this video from Reason Tv, about how Christmas gifts are better today than they were yesterday. Pay attention to the chart at the end of the video.

We have time! We have more time with family, friends, and ourselves compared to years gone by. What are you doing with that time. Yesterday during my conversation with local youth ministers, we are talking about being "simple" and how to make our ministries simple, I brought up that I've been noticing that people here do not like "simple", families now are always coming and/or going. They are either picking up their children or dropping off their children all around town. They are taking their excess of time and using to be busy.

For 2010, maybe we should take the time and slow down. Instead of running around with our family, take the moment to be around our family.

Authentic Faith

2009-11-04T10:06:00.001-05:00

This past week, "Authenticity" has been a huge topic. It was a topic in a podcast, it was part of the devotions that I been reading, and it was even in some of the magazine articles that I read for the past couple of days. I wasn't searching for this topic, it was just there. I believe authenticity is something we all seek. We want authentic friendships, conversations, and faith to name a few. When we see any of those as a fabrication, we easily get discouraged and want nothing to do with it.

As a Christian, faith is always on my mind. I want my faith to be authentic. I want people to see a difference in me. I want an faith, that when people look at me, they see it and are encouraged. If they see it as a negative I want them to be annoyed that my faith is authentic. In Daniel Chapter 6, Dan makes some of his coworkers mad because he was authentic. That is real and even when his faith was tested, he didn't waiver. He was a man of faith. That is what I want.

If you are a parent of faith, you want your children to see your faith as authentic. Authentic faith will be the greatest evangelism you can ever do to bring your children to Christ. If you rely on ministers or elders to bring your children to Christ, you are playing with fire with their souls. They could see a relationship with God like a leisure activity, and not a lifestyle. Work on your relationship daily and show your faith to all those around you especially your family.

Dream Catchers

2009-10-29T14:54:00.003-04:00

Came across a great story about a student named Killian Mansfield. Killian passed away this August from cancer, and my prayers go out to his family. Before he passed away he got to do something amazing. It was a dream of his to make a record album and was able to do so with his ukulele. The thing that amazed me about this story is the he told his parents that he wanted to record an album with not his friends but with famous people. And his parents went out and got some famous people, Dr. John, Kate Pierson, John Sebastian, Todd Rundgren and Levon Helm.

Here is a question for parents

What can you do to help your student achieve their dreams? These parents went out and did a great thing for their dying son, so what is something you could do this week to help your student get closer to their dreams.

National Cyber Security Awareness Month

2009-10-21T14:56:00.003-04:00

October is National Cyber Security Awareness Month, and there is a great website, http://www.staysafeonline.org, that has some helpful advise. This quote caught my eye

We don’t teach children to drive by giving them the keys to the car and expecting them to be “self-taught.” Similarly, we shouldn’t let them sit down at the computer and surf away without training and supervision. At times it may seem our children know more about the Internet and technology then we do, however, that doesn’t change the responsibility parents have to teach their children to use the Internet safely.

How true is that. This month is almost over, but take a look at the website. And work on some helpful tips especially on understanding cyber bullying. Take time to teach your children how to use the internet safetly do not just give them keys. Use programs like OpenDNS and lets take a proactive role on keeping our children safe.

Check out OpenDNS for a cheap and effective way to block out unwanted material. It is free also.

"Blow" the Energy Drink

2009-10-09T13:31:00.004-04:00

There are a couple of things that need to die down. The first one is zombie or vampire themes, when vampires fall in love or if Woody Harrelson does a movie about it, you know that it needs to go away. The other is energy drinks. There is a new energy drink that came across my desk today which is the "Jumping the Shark" of energy drinks. It is called Blow. That is right blow as in the term used for cocaine. NBCLosAngelos.com reviews the product

The energy drink mix, which is sold in a small vial, is measured in grams, just like the actual drug. As if that weren't enough, a small mirror is also included in the package so the energy deprived can grind the rocks into a fine powder.

My opinion is this is completely stupid. I do not think it will cause people to become cocaine users. If that was true pixie sticks would have been outlawed a long time ago. This is simply a gimmick, a marketing stunt that deserves no more attention but sadly it will, when in a couple of months when Nancy Grace or CNN pick up this silly story. This is a stupid product and hopefully it goes away like bicycle shorts. Yea I had a pair when I was younger.

What Would You Do?

2009-09-14T10:57:00.008-04:00

What would you do if your little girl won homecoming queen. She is beautiful standing on the fifty yard line, as the lights from the stadium are bouncing off her tiara. Right before she gets to speak an upset man comes on the field and takes her microphone. He then starts talking about how she was not the most beautiful girl in the school, and how the runner up should have won.

How would you feel? What would you do?

Well this happen to a seventeen year old performer named Taylor Swift here is what happened...

Taylor Swift gets the award for Best Female Video, and in the middle of her speech, Kanye West takes her microphone right out of her hands. And tells her basically that Beyonce should have won. Then he walks off stage, and it is believed that he was escorted out of the building.

It's funny how some people lose the aspect of age when it comes to performers. I saw it with Brittney Spears and how grow adults talked about her as a sex object at sixteen and you see it today with Miley Cyrus. Even though Taylor Swift has made more money than I will ever in my lifetime, she is still a girl. Even though she has been and experienced more in life, she is still a girl.

Taylor Swift is a girl, a young lady. This is not only a case of disrespect in the work place, its also an act of bullying. West comes out and bullies this girl. His verbal rant basically tells her you are second best, you do not deserve this award.

As a parent though, we can make the situation worse. Now when I see this, I would want to go up and punch West right in the face. But that wouldn't help anything and would make the situation worse for the family. We need to be able to forgive and be able to teach our students that. Forgiveness is the greatest lesson we can ever teach our students. Forgiveness builds great character and heals. Hitting West in the face might be good at the moment, but only for a moment.

I just wanted to finish giving Beyonce a pat on the back for acting classy. Beyonce later won Video of the year, and let Taylor come back out to finish her speech.

Good Job Canadian Parents!

2009-09-02T14:27:00.001-04:00

Read a great article on Canada.com about how students in Canada are enjoying school more today than they have in the past. They do credit the rise to their enjoyment because of all the activities and options they have then previous generations, but those most striking and optimistic thing about the article is this.

Bibby, a professor of sociology at the University of Lethbridge, credits parents for having better relationships with their kids (enjoyment of moms and dads was correlated with enjoyment of school)

I hope this true in our country as well. Parents in America lets do our job by having a good relationship with your own students. I will keep my eyes open for any stats or polls, but good work to our lovely northern neighbors parents.

Allowence with PayPal

2009-08-22T15:49:00.006-04:00

PayPal has opened to everyone a great service for your student, and that is a Student Account. How this works is that the parent with a PayPal account signs up their student, they will receive a debit card in the mail. The parent then can wire money directly from their checking account to the students debit card. The best part is that when the student spends the money, you can see where they have spent their money.

Now there is pros and cons for this.

Cons.

1. Your student might not get the concept of saving.

We spend more money with cards then we would with cash. They need to understand scarcity, opportunity cost and the importance to teach your student about a savings account. I suggest you make an allowance with your student, and then take out room and board, taxes, and savings. If you are religious, a tithe, if not maybe a non profit organization in your community. Then give them the rest in the card. This will help your student know that there are things that have to be taken care of first before they spend.

2. Your student might make poor choices

With a card, there is places on the internet that your student can access now that were not available because they are card only. A lot of pornography, accept cards only and then give the buyer a false name on the bill in order to disguise itself. But if you are good at checking the reports on the PayPal page, and talk to your student about their spending habits or questionable activity that should help detour especially if they know you will chatting with them about it.

Pros

1. Teaches your student about cards

Credit card debt in America is ridiculously out of hand. Buy now, pay later is a horrible concept, but most likely your student will get a credit card at freshman orientation when they enroll in college. Junior High and High School are better times to teach your students about financial responsibility.

2. Gives them more responsibility and accountability

This gives the student more freedom to buy things for themselves on the internet and in stores, which is good for them. Good for you, unlike cash you can have a record of what they are spending their money on. If you check the report and see that they are spending way too much money on consumables you can teach them about maybe saving up for a bigger items.

3. You control the amount

I suggest giving your student a dollar a week for every year they are born, then taking out room and board, tithe, savings, taxes. So when my sons get five they might be receiving actually $3.50. It is just easier to wire the money to a card, then actually getting change out. Most likely I will not be giving my kids this until at the least ten it was just an example.

I think this service will be good for some people and bad for others. Only you can decide but there is no better time to teach your student about how to manage their finances then right now.

Planet of the Geeks

2009-08-19T13:24:00.002-04:00

Growing up was a little difficult for me because I was a geek. I was a indoors, play video games in my room social nightmare. I did not play football or baseball, if I played sports it was bowling and soccer. The lazy man sport and the sport many people called "gay". I also was in a traveling baton and drum corp, yup that is right I had no hope of being a normal adult. Like I said, I was a geek.

Fast Forward to today, and our culture is quite different. Where being a geek is celebrated instead of an out cast. Instead of Screech from Saved by the Bell as the standard of geeks, we have Jimmy Fallon, J.J. Abrams and Joss Whedon. Almost everyone plays video games which was a staple of geeks for many years. And even sports fan have their own role playing games (Fantasy Football) but do not tell them its geeky, it will ruins the fun. Geekdom is everywhere and I welcome it with open arms.

At the same time I have concern for this, because even though being geek is popular right now we should not treat the unpopular poorly. I have seen enough reality television that shows that mankind can be ruthless to the people on the bottom. For those that are outcast now, we need to able to show love and kindness to them. Everyone no matter who they are, just wants to be accepted.

A little message to parents since this is a parenting blog. I would love to have my sons be geeks like their parents, but my son already throws a football better than his dad, and he is almost three. What ever personality your children have, love them and accept, no matter if its a social outcast. You might be surprised that the outcast today are the ones that create the standard for tomorrow.

A Meal A Day Together

2009-06-15T10:54:00.003-04:00

Came across this incredible blog from Wayne Rice. It's about eating a meal together with your family. Here are some of the highlights that I couldn't agree more with.

2. Don't turn the conversation into an interrogation session about school, activities, or relationships. A more off-the-wall conversation starter might be better. "If you could have dinner with anyone in history, who would it be?"

4. Don't watch TV while doing dinner. If you have a TV in the dining area, leave it off.

10. You can also use dinner as a time to affirm family values. For example, you might say grace or have family devotions together. One family we know has a jar of names (relatives, family friends) from which they draw a name and pray for that person at mealtime. Do whatever works for you.

The one I want to focus on the most though is this one

8. Don't worry if you can't have dinner every night. If your family is used to a "gang grab" (whatever you can find) approach to mealtime, try having dinner just one or two nights a week for starters. Then work your way up to at least five.

I love this idea because right now time is valuable. If you hardly ever eat together as family, you may look at your schedule and see that there is no time for this. That is why #8 is so important because it says do not try every night but make an effort for 1 - 2 nights a week. This type of rule works in all aspects of your life, taking small steps and gradually trying to make it a normal part of your life.

It's sad to think that our family life has stepped away from family time and has filled with extra curricular activities such as sports and even church. This summer before you sign your students up for t-ball think your family time first. Do not neglect this because it will pay off for your life in long run.

Texting Problems

2009-05-28T11:41:00.004-04:00

Recently came across an article from the New York Times about teenagers and texting. On average a student texts about 80 texts per day which comes around 2000 texts a month. So if you do not have unlimited texting you might want to consider getting it. With the excessive number of texts the students are having some problems have been rising from it. First it is causing emotional problems such as withdrawal, going through some anxiety disorder when they cannot text. Second it is causing bad sleep behaviors as some students sleep with their phones on vibrate and then when it goes off in the middle of the night they can respond back. Lastly it is also causing some physical problems with soreness if their fingers and wrists.

Communication is a great tool and vital in our community. It is good for students to be in touch with each other and anything that improves more communication is great. Even good behavior can become bad though with excessive use and that is true with everything. I see this a lot with churches in general, as parents or students who are overly involved leads to problem in marriages and families. So good behavior can be bad if used excessively.

So what part of this should we fix?

Well if your student is addicted to this behavior already, do not cut them off cold turkey. Just like any addiction you need to cut down gradually. Start with no phones at night, if they use it as an alarm clock then go buy one, and make sure the phone is away from the student at night.

Regulate hours, like not during studying time or not passed a certain time at night. Me and Jess are normally in bed by nine pm, people know that, we used to get calls at that time but after they woke us up a couple of times during the night, word spread. Their friends will know when eventually that they do not get a response back until the morning.

Lastly check yourself. I know I will have a problem when my young children grow up and start playing video games with dad, because I do play a lot. I am working on my time right now, playing only times when my wife allows me too. Yes I do ask my wife for permission to play, and I am almost 30 It is not because my wife is a slave driver but instead because I want her to know that I value the time we spend. And when my boys get older, I expect that they will have certain rules to follow also. Set the example in your own home, if you are constantly on the Black Berry to check emails, tweet, or text and expects your students to be regulated and you do not regulate yourself it will be a disaster and very hypocritical. Your student needs you to set the rules for the whole family, including mom and dad.

Improving For Your Own

2009-05-22T12:10:00.001-04:00

Recently I have been compelled to improve myself in areas that I lack in, but not for my job. Instead I have been working on improving areas for my own children. Recently in last couple of years I want to be the best student minister that I can be, lately I have been improving the presentation of our Sunday Night Group and trying to get more people involved in the creativity planning of our ministry. In the last month, I decided to work on my storytelling because of the popularity of this in ministry. As I was improving this skill I realized that maybe I should not be working on this for my job but instead for sons. Hunter loves to listen to stories, and Conner most likely will also because they seem both to have my wife's love for written word.

I hope this mentality continues until as my children grow up to be teenagers. I hope if they show interest in music and sports, that I am willing to improve myself for the soul purpose of relating with them.

Are you like that? Are you improving yourself in ways to create a stronger bond with your own student? If not, take the time to consider what you can do to improve your relationship with them.

Untied Shoes

2009-05-08T13:35:00.001-04:00

Here is a weird fact about me, I do not like my shoes to be tied. Maybe that is not weird, maybe its just a stupid fact but I do not like having my shoes tied. I just tuck them in the sides of my shoe and I am off for the day. Most times my shoe laces will pop out and I can several people who stop me to tell me that my shoes are untied. They tell me because they do not want to trip and fall which will cause pain to by body. The person can be a perfect stranger but they feel compelled to tell me that I have my shoes untied.

How does this relate to parenting? Most likely you have told either your student or others that your shoes are untied, but do you do it for anything else? Do you allow your student to listen to music that degrades women? Do you allow your students to watch adult situation television? Do you allow your student to skip out of church?

It's funny we give our students helmets when they go on bike rides, or make sure they are seat belted in the car, or even make sure they have tied shoes but when it comes to things that have the potential of damaging their soul we give them freedom to make their own choices.

Give your student, your time this week.

Open-Closed Minded People?

2009-05-01T11:21:00.002-04:00

This past week, Youtube, RSS feeds, and every social networking is talking about Miss California, Carrie Prejean. She is extraordinary beautiful and is dating Micheal Phelps, but those things are not the topic of discussion. What everyone is talking about her answer to pseudo celebrity Perez Hilton. The question was on gay marriage and should other states allow gay marriage. Whatever you believe about the issue doesn't matter, but Miss California did answer this tough. You can see at first she tries to give a general response and almost tries to avoid it. Then you see something click in her mind, and she gives her opinion that she feels marriage is between a man and woman.

Again I am not blogging to talk about the issue of gay marriage, but what scares me the most about this is the slander that Carrie Prejean has gotten for this comment and ultimately for her opinion. Carrie has gotten so much negative feed back from this. In an age where we are told to be open minded in life, we get closed minded responses from those people that proclaim to be open minded. In all reality Carrie is being bullied by the bloggers and media, being told she is a hack, and a blonde idiot. Which are unfair statements because they are bashing her character. All of this bashing is on her opinion about a debated issue.

All this tells me this, people don't want to hear something they don't agree with. They want us to listen to them but when the opposition speaks they don't care. This is also sad because we tell our students not to be ashamed, to speak their minds, but this event tells me that if you speak your mind of a public platform you will be slandered. If you are in the public you need to believe what we believe because if you don't we will degrade your character. We will give characterize you and we will attempt to destroy your life. Have a good day.

Parents we need to teach our students to stand for what they believe in and not to worry about what the people around them say about them. If we allow others to bully us, then we will never preach the gospel. Christianity is always one generation away from dying. Let us always preach God's message.

Failing in School

2009-04-17T11:42:00.001-04:00

Getting a poor grade is bad, but is it bad enough to banish them for your school? An article came across my desk today that was about this very thing in my own backyard in Grand Rapids. Bernard Taylor the superintendent says he rather give "H" 's instead of "F" 's because it gives more opportunity. Some people are for and some are against this idea.

I see both sides, I can see how some students can be sensitive of it but at the same time I can see that this is not giving the students the opportunity to experience failure. In reality changing the grading system will not solve the problem of students failing in schools even if we change the word. I recently had a student that came into my office crying about school. He wasn't crying because his grades are bad, he wasn't crying because he felt like a failure, instead he was crying because everyone in his life called him a failure. Now I personally don't know what the words were, but I do know that this is how he felt and these were things he was saying to me. That his school teachers, principals and parents were saying he was a failure. Telling he wasn't putting in the time, that he was being lazy, and that he simply wouldn't amount to anything. That he was a complete failure. Unfortunately I have had this talk with students before even students who got a “B” because they were expected to get nothing less than an “A+”.

I think the fault is in the idea we have set on this generation of students. We have a set standard that every student in American needs to follow. But that standard doesn't fit all our students. You know whatever letter code you add to your school system it won't help unless schools and parents understand that not every student is a scholar. I have many members in my personal family that failed in education but succeeded in life because they were trades man. They had a skill and they were good at that skill. I on the other hand am good at education but when it comes to trade skills I am lacking. Not every student needs to go to college, not every student needs an education. Don't get me wrong I do value education and college, and we encourage all our students to give college a year just to experience it.

This student failure is in English but he excels in technology. He most likely will use very limited English and grammar skills when he gets in the working world. He will mostly likely be in a job where he looks back and forget all the things he was forced to learn, but he will always remember how his teachers, principal and parents made him feel. We need to start seeing the strengths of our students and praise them for that.

Take the time and spend time with your student.

Murtaugh List

2009-04-01T10:29:00.001-04:00

First I want to start off by saying that I love the show, How I Met Your Mother. I think the show is a good reflection on the young adults of the day, and the transition during your twenties. This past week, episode 19 of season 4 titled “Murtaugh”, was funny and had many good truths in it.

In the episode, Ted decides to put laser tag on a list titled “Murtaugh List”. If you have seen and loved the movie “Lethal Weapon”, than that name would ring a bell. Murtaugh was the cop played by Danny Glover, who is about to retire from the force. Every time he gets into a situation he doesn't like he says “I'm too old for this”. Warning the phrase has a vulgarity after it, but it's not important. I just wanted to warn thats all. The whole episode is about his friend doing all the things on the list, like going to a rave, sleeping on a futon, and over excessive drinking. All of those things I would personally never do and I do not condone any of those actions, but in the end his friend realizes that he is too old for those things. Ted on the other realizes there is another part to the list. “Lethal Weapon” was the first in a four movie series and in every movie Murtaugh says the same thing. Even though he is too old to do that stuff he doesn't lay around and do nothing. He still does it, he still lives.

As I get older, I am realizing there is some things that I cannot do like I used to. Lock Ins, eating at Taco Bell at two am, or getting up in the morning and driving to whereever. My life has different responsibility now, and my body is not as young as it used to be, but those should not be any excuse for not living. As a student minister and a parent I need to work on making sure I do not make excuses for not doing things. I need to live with the students and my children. I may hurt a little bit for it, but the impressions on their life will make an impression on mine.

This week give your student, your time.

CyberBullying

2009-03-13T10:11:00.002-04:00

If there is one thing that I do not tolerate if would be being bullied. Coming from a guy that had his fair share of encounters with them because of my height and my love of soccer. Yea that is right I like soccer. I do not like when kids are treated unfairly for their preferences or things that they cannot control such as height or weight. The sad part of it is that parents do not help when it comes to this subject. I had parents tell me that is was natural for kids to be mean and so forth. That is nonsense and a completely moronic view in life.

Well bullying has it hit popular social sites, and some students have ended their life because of cyber-bullying. This is a serious issue and it can be almost completely. The Ad Council has a commercial that brings attention to this, but the problem with this commercial is it only hits the most flagrant of offensives.

There is plenty of ways to cyberbully. Recently I came across a website www.thatsnotcool.com.

This site is a great source to encounter all sorts of pressure a student may encounter from others on the internet. This weekend make some time with your student and go through this site together and talk about this growing threat to our society.

Summer Troubles

2009-03-06T13:13:00.001-05:00

The summer is around the corner, here in Michigan it was 8 degrees on Tuesday and today its in the 60's. I live in the weirdest state!! I recently read an article that said that student who are bored get into more trouble. You can read the article here

I have known that fact for a long time now, at the church I work we had programs to set up after school so the students had a place to go and to prevent students from getting into trouble. The one thing that shocked me about this article was that students get in trouble with drugs in alcohol more in summer and winter break times, and it wasn't a small change it was almost double!!

So what can we do to help your students this summer, besides sending them to summer long camp. I love the suggestions they gave like “Get a Job”, “Start a Hobby”, and the old faithful “Give them Chores” . Those are all great ideas but the idea I like the best is “Volunteer”.

A new trend this year for College Students on Spring Break is to volunteer instead of partying. More and more students since 9/11 and Katrina are doing more projects to help out our country and this is wonderful. I only have seen students who join Christian Campus Houses doing this but more and more Non-Christians are doing this.

So get your student involved! Many churches would love someone to come in and do work during the day. Homeless shelters, Habitat for Humanity, Humane Society are great places to volunteer. Work with your students and see what they are interesting in doing.

Exposed

2009-03-02T13:16:00.000-05:00

This past weekend, we went to the Michigan Statewide Convention in Kalamazoo. I love this convention because I am able to meet up with friends that I haven't seen in awhile and the students can mingle with other students in the state in which we live in.
The theme of this week was "Exposed" and how we need to be exposed in our life in order for God to heal us. A very basic concept, confess and repent. This of course was stated pretty directly to students and simply put them in their place. It was a throw down and in your face type of weekend, and bet you that even adults got a little smacked in the back of their heads.
It gave me a personal question to ponder on, "Am I Exposed?" Now I am a minister and one would think that I would have it altogether. That is simply a false perception. I have sinned in many ways, but I know to confess and repent. It is a hard thing to do, and sometimes it feels like I am always asking but God cares and loves me.
The concept is simple and we should ask ourselves that question more than we do....

Online Safety

2009-02-25T11:56:00.000-05:00

The Internet is very complex system, it is filled with all sorts of information, entertainment (good and bad), and a slew of social activities. You can find almost anything you are looking for and you can also find almost everything you were not looking for. One day I was doing a report on tariffs and NAFTA. This was before Wikipedia, and other information sites like that, and one of the first hits I got looked promising but instead of NAFTA, I got a gay and lesbian comic book. Now don't ask me how those were related, but its a little scary what you can get into.

If you are a parent, then you know how scary the Internet can be and you probably have tried your hardest to make sure your student stays on the up and up. Maybe you have done Net Nannies, or just banned certain sites. I know some of the sites that get a lot of blunt to it, are MySpace and Facebook. Those sites are not bad, but thanks to “Catch a Predator” we have a idea that sexual predators are around every corner. Don't get me wrong sexual predators are out there, and we need to careful about that, but there is a smart way to these sites.

Espin.com, a social website did a great video on “Online Safety” . You can check the video below...

I personally enjoy Facebook and Myspace. I am able to chat with long time friends, and I am able to keep people up to date with my personal life. I do have some suggestions for you.

First, give them a time limit. You can easily waste all your time doing the silliest of things like Super Poking. Give them a set time, and punish them if they aren't doing their basic chores and school work.

Second, check their site or have all their messages come to your inbox. This helps monitor cyber bullying, or sexual harassment from other peers. I think their friends can be worse than any stranger they might come across. If you think that is evading their space then sit down and chat with them about their Internet friends every other day.

Finally, get on your own account and have your student on your friend list. You might be surprised how your student friends act and even how your own student posts. Also you be surprised how much you enjoy these sites yourself.

Being arrested for Texting?

2009-02-18T15:34:00.000-05:00

I recently came across an article about a High School student in Wisconsin being arrested for texting while in class. Well that isn't very accurate, she wasn't arrested for texting she was arresting mostly because she wasn't cooperating with authorities. Now I don't agree with the idea of bringing the police in because a teacher couldn't control his own class, but this shows how different respect is today.

I remember stories of High School from my parents, where the students were taken out of class and into the hallways and got spanked (Yes I said spanked) for disrespecting your teacher. When I was in High School, we were only really disrespectful to the substitutes some times to the regular teachers but police officers was out of question.

Today I see in my daily life, disrespect everywhere. Students are disrespectful to their almost every authority, from parents to police officers. I don't know where it came and why so many people have it, but I know the solution comes from the Golden Rule. Treat others as you would like to be treated. Personally for me, I used this in my daily life and my job. Sometimes I forget and I do some pretty rotten things and those fruits are shown right back at me, but when I am treat others with respect it is given back just a little slower.

Example of this, when I first came to Battle Creek some of the students decided they were going to wrestle with me. They knocked me down and started beating me up, now I didn't want to wrestle or fight so I took it. The guys were a little shocked that I didn't fight back, when asked why, I simply said “I don't wanted to be treated as your punching bag”, since then those guys don't treat me like that we have a different relationship.

Try it out with your family, and don't give up if it doesn't work right away.

Jim Burn's article

2009-02-12T13:36:00.000-05:00

I wanted to pass along a great article from Jim Burns.

Authenticity

2009-02-04T13:39:00.001-05:00

I love commercials, and I enjoy watching all sorts of them. The commercial that catches my attention a lot are the Bud Light, commercial on "Drinkability". The commercial is funny, but I don't like because its funny, but it portrays something huge. Authenticity. Growing up in a house where beer was affluent, those commercials show me what life was like growing up. People around in the backyard, eating hotdog's, and enjoying each others companies. It is authentic and I would surmise that people who buy Bud Light think that way also.

Authenticity is huge especially with teens today. Recently I read an article in wear companies try to market their product in situations that students would normally be in. Like "Friday Night Lights" showing the athletes using Under Armour in the game. Students athletes are more likely to buy those because they see Under Armour in use. It has more impact on that show then showing overly bulk men yelling at each other.

Being authentic is the biggest tool on making an impact in the lives of the people around you. As a Christian minister, if I want to make a spiritual impact in the students lives, I need to live a solid Christian life. I also need to make every student that walks into our doors that I personally care about each one.

In a world where trust is hard to come by, being a little authentic will go a long way.

The Mighty Power of the Dinner Table

2009-01-12T13:29:00.000-05:00

I recently read an article about parents are not the best barometers for their children's eating habits. You can check the article at

They looked at all ages and found out that parents with young children do a lot better than parents who have older children. This was interesting and maybe you would consider it being a generational thing but that is not the case. Parents with older students...

did not eat dinner with parents as often as the preschoolers did, a factor generally thought to lead to kids making poorer food choices.

Even though younger children were not eating and exercising the way they need to be, they are still a lot better then older children. And one common theme was the dinner table.

What type of influence can a table have? Well obviously, it helps with good behavior with food, but it also can help with manners. From table manners, to oral manners. Saying please and thank you are great manners to have. It can also help with prayer. Spending time giving thanks to the cook and to God for supplying the food is a great way to show respect. Finally, it helps end the day on a good note. Sitting at the table talking to one another and not fighting is a great way to have a family time.

Take a week and try this out.

Having A Bad Perfect Score

2008-12-29T09:32:00.000-05:00

Have you had a perfect score?

When we think about having a perfect score we always associate it with a good thing. Well sometimes you can a perfect score in something bad. This past weekend, Gordon had to take the weekend off because of a new arrival in their family. Now when Gordon leaves, something always goes wrong. And this weekend was no exception.

It started to show right in the beginning. The worship team which was well prepared, had no problems during practice, but when it came time for the service had feed back in the monitors and sound was a disaster. It did get resolved very quickly, our sound guy is very good. Of course there was minor glitches throughout the service which always adds a little stress.

I have come to think that Gordon should never again take a vacation. Just kidding, I think I'll take a vacation with him next time.

Even though that happens there is always a silver lining in the cloud. Even though we had troubles, people still were focusing on worshiping God. After the problems in the beginning, our worship leader simply said, “Problems happen, but that shouldn't hold us back from worshiping God”. How true is that. Sometimes I can get caught up in trying make everything perfect, and I do believe we should present the best to God, but sometimes that doesn't happen.

Let us not great stressed when little glitches happen and let anything hold us back from giving God praise.

Where did my cable go!

2008-12-23T09:14:00.000-05:00

This year me and Jess had something terrible happen, our cable was cut in half. I know that doesn't sound like a bad thing, but when you had 60 channels and got into a numerous shows like Monk, Psych, The Closer, Ace of Cakes, and The Soup plus sports galore, then one day all you have is basic channels its a little hard. We were pretty dumb founded and channel surfer hasn't been the same for me. We spend a couple of nights watching Wheel of Fortune wondering how can our grandparents figure out the puzzles so fast.

Even though it was hard, this actually has been a good thing for our family in a couple of ways.

First, we watch a lot less television. I love Law and Order, and you can see an episode at every hour, on any day of the week. So when we were bored we watched Law and Order. Now we read a lot more and get some house work done. I am also able to finish some hobbies and watch some more movies that I missed during the year.

Also, we are still able to watch all those shows that we were on standard cable on the Internet. Hulu, and YouTube have all the shows. You have to deal with connection and minor ads but free is better than spending an extra 360 dollars a year to watch 5 extra shows.

Limited television + more money = A better life

This year many people will have some money issues, and sometimes entertainment is the last thing to go on some budgets. We will limit the quality of food, quantity of gas, but still keep the cable the same or minimum downgrade on it. I encourage anybody to try out basic cable service, and get your favorite shows online. It just might take your family to a place it has never been before.

This has worked out great for our family and it can work great for you. All you have to do is try.

Financial Role Model - Please Stand Up

2008-12-18T10:55:00.000-05:00

Great article from the Freep.com <http://tinyurl.com/3hkree> about the current problems that business people are showing our young people today. This is an excerpt from the OPed...

"The Millennials have grown up immersed in messages to spend, yet few understand the economics or the mechanics of money"

This is a scary quote, because it is a sad truth. I was brought up with no money background. My parents unfortunately are gamblers when it comes to loans. They get loans expecting to be able to pay it off, but when speed bumps come into their life they endure great frustration and burden.

My grandfather always told me the right and wrong way to spend money, but I didn't get it until I got a book called "A Total Money Makeover" by Dave Ramsey. Basically the idea is stay out of debt, use cash and don't buy things you can't afford. Crazy concept.

What we need is great role models around us. The article finishes with this...

Parents, teachers, employers, lawmakers and any individual with influence over those in this cohort should consider the impact of their financial behavior on these impressionable young people. If we teach and model responsible money management, we will ensure that this generation will embrace the principles upon which this society and economy were founded.

As a student minister, I need to be very concerned with how I spend my money. If I buy a big ticket item, I make sure the students know that I saved up for years to get it. I don't take car loans out, I don't buy things that I can't afford (Iphone), and I save my money. Lets make sure we are the best role models for the generations to come, because the one place we really need it is in our finances.

Take time for your friends.

2008-12-17T13:36:00.000-05:00

With the holiday season around the corner, you will be bombarded with gifts and of course family. I love my family and enjoy spending time with my wife's family also but when you are spending most of your time going here and there is just gets tedious.

I have noticed lately that this feeling comes only with family, if I spent a week with my friends, even if they aren't close, I have a better time and I don't feel so drained and annoyed.

So why is this?

First, you can't choose your family. Your family is given to you at birth, and if you get married, you get more. Family is wonderful and very valuable but because you can't choose them it makes them more annoying. Friends are accumulated and trimmed out as your life progresses.

Second, your family thinks they are top priority. I don't know why or how this happens, but family always wants the best time slots in the year. Christmas, Easter, Birthdays etc. Friends get invited to them, but family doesn't understand when you spend most of your time with friends.

Third, you always need to impress them. I don't know why, but for some reason our house needs to pristine when family comes. When friends come, our house just has to be clean and picked up. But family its a Extreme House Makeover.

Finally, family never changes. I have noticed over the years, that family always thinks the same they did the last time you saw them. Me and Jess still have the same arguments with the same family members, when events comes around. You get the same stories each time, and the same problems. With friends you might share some of the stories you had in college, but its story that you both enjoyed together.

You may agree or disagree with what I write, but I want to encourage anyone whom reads this. Take time this holiday season and enjoy time with friends. I bet your holidays will have one event you are looking forward too.

Teen Driving

2008-12-12T10:00:00.000-05:00

I recently got an email telling me about teen driving in general and some tips to help teens drive better on the roads. What got me a looking concerned was the very first tip.

Set a positive example. Make a commitment to avoid talking or texting while driving. Remember, you are the most important influence on your teen.

I don't know if this is me, but isn't this commonsense. Has our culture commonsense gone south with birds. This should be self explanatory. Parents influence their children from 1 - 99. Seriously, my child picks up the stupidest things from me. You would think the would pick up the good behavior but he usually grabs onto the bad stuff. Even when it comes to me a 20 something adult, some of the things my dad does still has a influence on me.

So if you are parent or a parent to be, please remember that you are always impacting your child's life. Work and strive for being the best role model you can be from driving to drinking your V-8. FYI - Jess is making me drink V-8 in the morning to promote good health for Hunter. Please pray for my taste buds.